When I hear the word “chicken noodle soup,” I have one reaction: let me eat it.
That was particularly true last week when I experienced my first college illness. I desperately wanted chicken noodle soup, but my options were limited to Campbell’s Chicken Noodle Soup and Campbell’s Chicken Noodle Soup, both of which contained literally two pieces of chicken and ten noodle strands.
Okay, that’s an exaggeration. The amount of noodles in the can is actually now quite impressive.
Being the intelligent college student I am, I realized I had the following things on hand:
- pre-grilled steak pieces
- spinach leaves
- ground pepper
Also a box of Kleenex and a laptop with Netflix. But those are inedible and therefore irrelevant in life.
Anyway, I proceeded to perform my signature masterchef maneuver; I put everything in a glass bowl and microwaved it until hot.
By the way, I realized spinach leaves were too big so I had to tear them into smaller pieces.
I know, it’s that kind of improvisation that makes me feel like a true chef.
Monsieur. Baguette. Croissant. François.
I don’t know why so many college students (and normal people) rely on pre-packaged food. Even without a fridge or microwave, it’s entirely possible to eat well.
If all else fails, buy some bananas at least. I mean, I’m pretty sure you can’t get Snickers, Lay’s, Oreos, or even Ramen as cheap as 60¢ a pound.
And you know what? Prepackaged stuff is only faster by a matter of 10 or 15 minutes, aka that extra time you spend every day Facebook-stalking that one kid from elementary school.
I’ve done it.
You’ve done it.
And I’m sure we can both agree that souped-up soup is more satisfying than the weird pictures on your stalkee’s Facebook profile.
But only by a little.